September Men's Room

The bowed and the beautiful

Well, first of all, it takes courage. 

You have to be prepared for the naysayers and the slackers, the folks who wear T-shirts to dinner. Not every neck is cut out for a bow tie. 

If you’re shy, go ahead, stick with the fat banker or hipster thin; you’ll fit in with everyone nicely. To me, the bow tie is a tiny billboard that broadcasts, “I’m smart, fun and I can take care of business.”  It’s a beautiful stamp of preppy indecency − a pox upon all who can’t match purple and plaid.

Our fathers throughout time have been flustered by the uninformed persistence of changing dress codes and have had a rough time passing it down to the brood. I still believe that, as with shaving, it is learned in the mirror with as much reassurance for both the man and child. Practice.

And when that goes wrong, you can always fall back on Mom to fix the knots and straighten the folds. 

At the party, sure everyone feels stuffy, but now we’re all in the same penguin club together, and I always love a chance to reach deep into the old haberdashery for something a little polarizing. This is the menagerie we want to see; our ladies are beautifully dressed, and we all look like James Bond clones. 

The bow tie has been kicked around for a few centuries with obnoxious results, but how hip were the first cats in the 1880’s bucking the standard three-piece gear with ascots and cravats? For me, the tie is the point in an exclamation of the grand evening before us.

In this modern age of casual comfort (that you know is ugly), you’re moving forward with appreciation, tradition and composure.

Oh, you’ll wrestle with it for 15 minutes, get ticked and then go a few more rounds. But at the end of the dance, it’s a proud moment. 

Knotting the bow tie is the last checkpoint before you depart. And after I’ve finished foolishly tying it, I always love looking into my wife’s eyes and asking her, “Does it look good?”  Knowing the answer.

Bryan Cournoyer is a contributing writer and actor residing in the ILM. Known for his short stature, big personality and witty reparte, he is married to Nina, but is also available for parties, weddings and business events. Cheers!

To view more of Mark Weber's work, click here. www.markweberart.blogspot.com