Reshaping the Workplace

For many of us, the climb to leadership has felt like scaling a mountain in ill-fitting boots. Traditional leadership models, built on stoicism, command-and-control, and rigid hierarchies, often clashed with the strengths we naturally possess such as collaboration, empathy, focus on shared purpose, and communication.

This disconnect can leave us feeling like imposters and phonies, struggling to reconcile our authentic selves with the perceived demands of our work.

But a new wave is rising, and I’m here to champion it: pleasure-based leadership. This approach dismantles the old guard, prioritizing joy, creativity, and a deep sense of shared fulfillment. It’s a framework perfectly aligned with the strengths women bring to the table, and it holds the potential to reshape the very fabric of leadership.

My journey demonstrates the power of this shift. I grew up in Queens, New York, in the late ’70s and early ’80s. I was a natural leader, drawn to positions of responsibility. I was school president, head of my church youth group, and captain of the Bayside High School cheerleaders.

However, a hidden struggle lurked beneath the surface. I was an abused kid. On the outside I excelled; on the inside I was a mess.

Growing up in a tough situation can really leave a mark, you know? It’s like those memories stick with you, making you doubt yourself and always feel like you’re not quite measuring up. At work, I learned leadership from the best coaches and trainers. I attended all the seminars and retreats and implemented those leadership skills in my workplace – authority and discipline, goal setting, problem-solving, and transactional leadership.

Even as I achieved success as a community and economic development manager at a major public utility in New York and then moving on to become a producer at NBC News, the feeling of being an imposter persisted.

The turning point in my life arrived from an unexpected source: A close friend introduced me to a six-month course on the art of pleasure. As I learned these amazing concrete tools on how to increase the pleasure in my life, I started to relate them to leadership and then started to use them in every area of my life.

It was a revelation. Instead of striving for an unattainable ideal of leadership, I learned to embrace my imperfections and lead with authenticity and vulnerability and have been doing it for the past ten years. It is remarkable how one course can change the trajectory of your life.

This shift was transformative. No longer bound by external expectations and old wounds, I started leading with a focus on what sparked joy and fulfillment within myself. Trusting my intuition and tapping into a sense of pleasure became my guiding compass, both professionally and personally.

The impact was profound.

People responded not to a facade but to the genuine vulnerability I now embodied. My leadership style became more inclusive and empathetic, rooted in a deep understanding of my strengths and limitations. It increased my salaries, it got me the jobs that I wanted, and when it was time to leave those positions, I left them in better shape than when I entered.

Pleasure-based leadership isn’t a fad; it’s the future. Here’s why it aligns so perfectly with the strengths we possess:

Unleashes Creativity: Leading with joy unlocks a wellspring of creative energy. This fosters innovation and problem-solving that benefits everyone. We, often stereotyped as nurturing, excel at fostering collaborative creativity.

Shared Leadership: Pleasure-based leadership thrives on collaboration and shared decision-making. This creates an inclusive environment where everyone feels valued and empowered to contribute. We naturally gravitate towards building consensus and fostering spaces where all voices are heard.

Leading with Fun: Let’s face it, work can be dull. Pleasure-based leadership injects a dose of enjoyment into the process, making it more engaging and motivating for everyone. We are adept at nurturing a sense of camaraderie and fostering enthusiasm within teams.

Effortless Grace: When leading with pleasure, there’s no need for force or manipulation. Confidence naturally emerges from authenticity and self-understanding. We excel at leading with grace and interpersonal sensitivity, building trust and genuine connections within teams.

My story is a testament to the power of this approach. By embracing your authentic self and leading with pleasure, you can discover a leadership style that is effective, fulfilling, and inspiring.

This is the future of leadership, and we, women, are uniquely positioned to be its champions. This new wave of leadership, driven by women and fueled by pleasure, has the potential to create a more positive and productive future for workplaces and society.

It’s a future built on joy, collaboration, and a deep sense of shared purpose – a future where everyone can thrive.

Annette Freeman is the owner and headmistress of The Goddess Portal (goddessportalcoaching.com). Through coaching, movement, and events, The Goddess Portal gracefully guides women to unlock and unleash their authentic selves and tap deeply into their gifts so they may show up powerfully in their personal and professional livesand in the world.

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