Keeping the Peace

Evans didn’t set out to become a mediator. Her early career centered on youth programs, including running Teen Court in New Hanover and Pender counties for thirteen years. But For nearly two decades, SHEILA EVANS has been a steady, neutral presence in some of the most emotionally charged moments of people’s lives. As executive director of the Coastal Community Mediation Center, the nonprofit she co‑founded in 2020, she helps families, neighbors, coworkers, and even strangers in conflict find a way forward – often when the court system can’t.  

everything changed the day she was “made” to go to district court. “I didn’t want to do it,” she recalls with a laugh. “And all of a sudden, I was like, ‘Oh, this is my thing.’” 

She discovered she had a natural ability to sit with people in conflict – not to judge, not to fix, but to guide. Over the years she facilitated child and family team meetings for the Department of Social Services, served as a district court mediator, and worked with cooperative programs like CROSSROADS and the University of North Carolina Wilmington Community Relations Alliance. Her reputation grew as the person who could handle the high‑conflict cases others avoided. 

When the mediation center she worked for closed, Evans missed the real, raw conversations that helped people move past the moment that brought them to court. So, she met a colleague for coffee. By the end of that conversation, they had decided to start something new. “We put a little bit more money into the program and created a non-profit. In February 2020, the Coastal Community Mediation Center was born,” Evans says. 

Her colleague later moved away, leaving Evans to run the center largely on her own, supported by a small team of dedicated volunteers. But she doesn’t mind. “We just love trying to help people work out the difficult and the ugly – the stuff people just can’t do on their own.” 

Much of the center’s work happens inside the courthouse – but not in the courtroom. Evans meets with the defendant and complainant in a small private room, where confidentiality is absolute. “I cannot be subpoenaed. We have judicial immunity,” she explains. “It’s a safe place to share your stuff.” 

Unlike a judge, who must focus strictly on the charge, Evans can explore the full context. A simple assault case might reveal deeper issues: co‑parenting challenges, financial strain, miscommunication, or long‑standing resentment. “The guilty/not guilty doesn’t always get to the heart of the problem,” she says. “Sometimes it makes it worse.” 

And mediation works. In 2024 and 2025, the center’s success rate hovered between 84% and 86%. But Evans is equally passionate about mediation outside the legal system. She regularly handles workplace conflicts, HOA disputes, and neighbor disagreements – some of the most emotionally draining conflicts people face. “It breaks my heart to think you go home every day, and you hate the person who lives next door,” she says. “That disturbs me more than family disputes.” 

The Coastal Community Mediation Center also offers a court‑ordered parenting program focused on child‑centered communication. “The children did not ask to be where we are today,” she says. “We have to come together and operate a business model for these children.” The class covers everything from avoiding arguments during custody exchanges to not sending hostile notes through a child’s backpack.  

The center has received some grant funding in the past, Evans says, but is not currently operating with any this year. Participants pay a fee of $60, she says, although sometimes judges will waive it. 

Evans believes the need for mediation has grown dramatically in recent years. “People are having trouble having a basic conversation,” she says. “There’s a culture of saying whatever you want without regard for feelings.” Technology, she adds, has made everything worse. “You’re angry, you put something on Facebook. Is it illegal? No. But does it start drama? Yes.” 

Evans’ approach is simple but profound. “You don’t know what somebody’s going through,” she says. “A lot of that comes out in mediation.” She encourages listening without interrupting and not to wait until resentment boils over. 

Evans also works full time as executive relationship manager to the CEO at Human Capital Solutions, and she credits her employer for allowing her the flexibility to do her nonprofit mediation work. And, it’s clear mediation is more than a side role – it’s her purpose. “Mediation is my niche,” she says. “It’s where I get to make a difference with people.” 

To view more of photographer Daria Amato’s work, go to dariaphoto.com

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